Diwali is one of those festivals which brings back tons of happy memories. Childhood Diwalis in Kolkata began with preparations a day or two before. Making yummy bakshanams (snacks) helping mother out particularly with sieving the flour for whatever sweets or savouries, cutting the designs of the matris / namakpare, tasting (a big and essential part of Diwali as it was one festival where you didn't have to wait for any puja to start munching, and of course running around to the neighbours to check what was on their menu list and comparing it with ours, then running around again on Diwali morning to distribute the goodies. Diwali mornings started with the eldest in the house - dad, grandmothers, mother applying oil on the head. Nallamma's was gentle, Appa's steady and firm, Amma and sometimes Pati's was full of brutal love 😃; the bath and eating the Diwali essential - the marundhu. The firecrackers (I sheepishly admit) was a big draw. The neighborhood dadas in Kolkata would go a few days prior to buy the fireworks from Luni and then would put us to work to sun them for better performance. In Coimbatore, all cousins sheparded by Annaji and later my eldest cousin would go to Townhall exhibition to buy fireworks. And then Diwali morning started early. In competitive spirit. Who wakes up when, bursts how many crackers, wakes up how many people. Much later, Dilwalis started becoming our own - with lots of lights, friends, food and of course Diwali snacks (one sweet, one savoury) and the Diwali essential - the marundhu. After finishing unbelievably long days of work, coming back home to start preps (invariably going on until midnight). 'Early-morning-bath' was replaced by 'whenever we wake up bath' calls to family and friends. Now while spending hours in front of stove / airfryer (sorry, pati!) slaving away over bakshanams, all these memories brim over. So much love, warmth, friendships, feels like a tight hug for the aching heart. Growing older comes with this bittersweet emotion I guess - deciding what we hold on to or what we let go. This year, as I will not be calling so many people (especially pati), I'll hold tight to those memories and hug those around tighter.
October 20 2025
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